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Struggle: From Victim to Victor

Reading time: 11 minutes

Struggle is an inherent part of human existence - a constant companion in our journey. Whether physical, emotional, or mental, struggles test our resilience, shape our personalities, and bring transformation in our lives.

Imagine walking through a dense forest. You can't seem to find a clear path. You trip over roots, push through the dense undergrowth, and are scraped by the branches. That’s a struggle. Now you may ask why it’s a necessity? Interestingly, without that struggle - without those little victory stories of overcoming each hurdle, your journey would lack substance and lessons of courage, patience, and perseverance.

The gem cannot be polished without friction, nor man perfected without trials.
- Confucius

Struggle can manifest in many forms - procrastination, fear, anxiety, financial difficulties, strained relationships, or health problems. Essentially, it’s our intrinsic response when faced with circumstances that challenge our normal routine or comfort zone. It's a signal that we need to adapt, learn, and grow. Yet, the process of struggle can be as daunting as it is beneficial.

So, how does one overcome struggle? Overcoming struggle involves recognizing it, understanding its root cause, and actively pursuing solutions. It’s about changing our perception from viewing struggles as hurdles to seeing them as opportunities to grow and learn. Embracing struggle, rather than avoiding it, paves the way for inner growth and development. It helps us to not only survive but thrive in the face of adversity.

Remember, struggles can break you, or they can make you stronger. It all depends on how you choose to respond.

Breaking Down Struggle

Struggle can best be defined as "the great difficulty or effort required to conquer, prevent, protect, overcome, or accomplish something". It often appears as daunting challenges, rough patches, or seemingly insurmountable obstacles. It's these 'mountains' we feel we must climb that represent our various struggles. Your struggle can be as tangible as financial hardship, or as abstract as a fear of failure. It can stem from external circumstances, such as living situation or job stress, or internal battles, like self-doubt or emotional trauma.

Every individual's struggle is unique; however, most struggles can be broadly categorized into internal struggles and external struggles.

  • Internal Struggles reside within us, often unseen by others, and generally concealed by us. These can encompass deeply personal and tumultuous battles, such as low self-esteem, battling anxiety, fighting depression, overcoming addiction, or wrestling with self-doubt.
  • External Struggles on the other hand, are struggles that are outwardly visible or based on tangible circumstances. These include dealing with job loss, coming to grips with divorce, handling the end of a business venture, or experiencing bankrupcy.

Whether your struggle is internal or external, it's important to remember that struggles are part of life, and overcoming them is part of the human journey.

How Struggle Manifests

Struggle often manifests itself in various forms. It's not always obvious or readily apparent, it’s usually subtle and it creeps into different aspects of our lives. It often has physical manifestations. You might find yourself constantly fatigued, losing or gaining weight unexpectedly, suffering from disrupted sleep, or lacking interest in previously enjoyable activities. These physical signs are your body's response to the stress and anxiety associated with your struggle.

Take note of these signs as they can provide insightful cues about your internal state and be indicators that it's time to seek help and initiate action towards resolution.

Let's explore the numerous ways in which struggle may emerge in your life.

  • Emotional Struggles encompass difficulties in managing and regulating emotions effectively. It often involves dealing with overwhelming feelings of sadness, anger, anxiety, or fear. These can engulf you in moments of crisis, or they can be a consistent undercurrent in your day-to-day life, making it difficult to find joy, peace, or contentment. Emotional struggles may stem from traumatic experiences, unresolved conflicts, or ongoing life challenges.
  • Mental struggles are more about your thoughts and perceptions. They can include challenges like self-doubt, negative self-talk, a fearful mindset, or cognitive distortions that paint an inaccurate picture of reality.
  • Physical struggles are related directly to your physical body. They can involve dealing with a health issue, struggling with weight or body image issues, or even wrestling with fatigue and lack of energy.

We navigate through different stages and face different battles as we grapple with our life's journeys, which can prompt struggle to manifest in specific areas of life. Six of these areas can be particularly tumultuous, namely:

  • Personal struggles may result from challenges related to relationships, self-esteem, identity, or personal growth. These struggles can arise from conflicts with family members, friends, or partners, as well as internal battles with self-doubt, fear, or insecurity.
  • Relationship Struggles. One such area where struggle commonly arises is in relationships. Whether it's conflict with a spouse, a falling out with a close friend, or strained family relations, these issues can trigger stress and emotional turmoil. Often, we find ourselves repeating negative patterns in relationships without understanding why or how to stop.
  • Social struggles are those related to your relationships and interactions with others. Struggling to connect with others, feeling isolated or misunderstood, or dealing with conflict can all fall under this category.
  • Professional struggles typically involve difficulties in finding or keeping a job, dealing with excessive work pressure, facing competition, experiencing setbacks in achieving professional goals. It could involve a toxic workplace environment, job dissatisfaction, dealing with stress and burnout, struggling with work-life balance or navigating difficult work relationships.
  • Financial struggles refer to challenges related to managing money, meeting financial obligations, or achieving financial stability. This can include dealing with debt, living paycheck to paycheck, facing unemployment, or experiencing financial setbacks.
  • Health struggles may manifest as ongoing pain, chronic illnesses, physical disabilities,  addictions, or unhealthy lifestyle habits. It may involve conditions like food or sleep disorders. A struggle in this sphere usually revolves around managing symptoms, maintaining health routines, or addressing medical diagnoses.

What Triggers Struggle?

Understanding the triggers of struggle is a significant step towards overcoming it. These triggers, often deeply rooted in our personal experiences, perceptions, and values, can range from day-to-day stressors to more significant, life-altering events.

  • Personal Limitations: One common source of struggle is the realization or perception of personal limitations. Perhaps you've struggled with something new, such as learning a complex skill or processing an emotion. This struggle may have come from your perception that you're unable to accomplish what you set out to do, triggering feelings of inadequacy or failure.
  • Unexpected Events: Change, particularly when it's sudden or unwanted, is another common trigger for struggle. This can take the form of a job loss, the end of a relationship, or a health crisis, causing distress and leading you to struggle to cope and adapt.
  • Interpersonal Conflicts: Disagreements and conflicts with others can lead to emotional struggle. Being in conflict can be stressful and emotionally draining, often triggering struggle as you navigate the situation.

Side Effects of Struggle

Your struggles can be compared to an ever-growing pile of garbage. Ignoring them won't make them disappear. Just like the trash heap, they continue to grow, lurking in the back of your mind and gradually becoming more overwhelming.

These struggles don't just wait passively. They intensify over time, often spiraling out of control. This can significantly impact your ability to enjoy life or carry out daily functions. Ignoring your struggles makes it even harder to solve them.

Ignoring struggles as they escalate is like letting a wound fester instead of treating it. The longer it lasts, the worse it grows. Allowing them to flourish in this way hardly rewards you.

Unaddressed struggles can seep into all aspects of your life. They could cause short tempers, nervous tics, or a feeling of restlessness and dissatisfaction. They can affect personal relationships and work performance.

There's a chance you'll encounter several changes in your daily life as a result of ongoing struggles. Feelings of anxiety or unease, which might be generally uncharacteristic, may become more frequent. There could also be an increase in emotional reactions such as anger, irritability or sadness. Your appetite might change, possibly leading to weight gain or loss, and your sleep patterns may be disrupted, causing insomnia or excessive sleepiness. Struggles can also lead to an exaggerated focus on certain areas, like work, resulting in longer hours at the expense of personal time and balance.

Additional potential implications might include:

  • Emotional exhaustion experienced after numerous unsuccessful attempts at progressing in life, coupled with the belief that you must persistently keep going, continue exploring new avenues, and tirelessly seeking the right opportunities.
  • Engaging in more frequent internal conflicts, where you're torn between your desires and your reservations about those same desires, unable to make a definite decision.
  • Building self-restricting beliefs, that after being confirmed, gather proof that you are incapable of achieving, possessing, or becoming what you desire.
  • Increased reluctance to embrace change, paired with a diminishing drive or willingness to step outside your comfort zone – this is often fueled by apprehension surrounding envisioned outcomes.
  • Oftentimes, a subtle yet dangerous manifestation of struggle surfaces as relentless discontentment. In this modern world, where achievement and success are heavily emphasized, you may find yourself always focusing on the goals yet to be reached, the dreams yet to be realized, thus forgetting to take stock of the victories already won, and the milestones already crossed.This tendency to persistently throw the spotlight on what's yet to be attained rather than celebrating what has already been achieved, paves the way for a toxic cycle of perpetual dissatisfaction.
  • Reduced willpower and motivation as ripple effects of a deteriorating self-image and waning self-esteem. Feelings of inadequacy start to consume you, mocking every effort you make to overcome the struggle.
  • Grappling with the same issues or continuing in what seems like an unending spiral - repeatedly stumbling into similar concerns or recurring problematic situations, leaving you feeling like you're trapped in an endless cycle. This is often a reflection of not having completely overcome a struggle from your past, or it could be a struggle inherited from your ancestors.
  • A flood of overpowering thoughts and feelings - akin to instances where you reflect on a past conversation, leveraging your creativity to reconstruct the narrative, filling it with responses and actions that, in hindsight, seem more appropriate, while re-experiencing all the sensations of anger, frustration, and disappointment from the original event

Taking Control of Your Struggles

Strength does not come from winning. Your struggles develop your strengths. When you go through hardships and decide not to surrender, that is strength.
- Arnold Schwarzenegger

Struggle isn't necessarily a negative thing, as many tend to perceive it. In fact, it is through struggle that the texture of our lives is enriched, much like the plot of a captivating movie. Picture this: a film where the protagonist triumphs easily at every turn, always winning without any challenge. It wouldn't make stimulating viewing, right? The same goes for our lives. Without highs and lows, victories and defeats, we are left with monotony which in turn, leaves us feeling passive and unfulfilled. So, in many ways, we crave struggle. We yearn for it. We understand its profound power to instigate change, bring about growth, and build endurance.

However, where the true complication lies is in our ability, or at times, inability to navigate these struggles. It's important to remember that being smart, resilient or well-off financially, doesn't automatically spell success. So often, we find ourselves bumping against unseen barriers preventing us from overcoming our struggles.

These elusive roadblocks might seem intangible but their impacts on our lives are very real.

With the understanding of struggle and its manifestations, it's crucial to acknowledge the link to trapped emotions. These capture the emotional energy of challenging experiences and may burden us, causing both psychological and physical discomfort. Sadly, they often lay undetected as root causes of many ongoing struggles.

Fortunately, you're not helpless against these trapped emotions. They can be identified and released. You can free yourself from these invisible bonds and move towards a happier and healthier life. Here's a recommendation that might surprise you: try an emotional code session. This technique aimed at uncovering and releasing trapped emotions, has benefitted many. It involves identifying precise emotions that contribute to your present struggle, and systematically releasing them, bringing about an emotional rebalancing that's often accompanied by a noticeable sense of relief.

Remember, engaging in an emotion code session is not just an act of self-love, but also a proactive measure to cool the fires of struggle. Your journey through struggle can indeed be challenging, but with the right strategies and mindful practices like freeing trapped emotions, you're certainly better equipped to navigate your way through.

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